do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
