Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize