I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
