i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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