): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
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