How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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