I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
But break dance skills will only take you so far
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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