I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Randomize