it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
whose ass print is on the piano?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize