Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
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