Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize