I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
