You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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