I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Its about making memories worth repressing
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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