I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
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