i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
