Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
