he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize