its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
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