So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
There r osticjed everywhere
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize