I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
