i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize