Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
