I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
