she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Come share oat with me in your robe