I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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