So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
