What did we do last night that was yellow?
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
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