I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
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