TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
don't judge my taste in strippers
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Randomize
