Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
