i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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