it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
