and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
