Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Randomize
