New low: just hacked my moms facebook
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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