Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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