you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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