ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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