I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize