There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
