Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize