i think my mom watched the whole time
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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