He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?