You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
