Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
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Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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