I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
She even gives head with a lisp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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