This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
