I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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