i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
